If you cannot work on yourself then how in the world can you expect to improve yourself. Self work is tough but it has to be done if you want to see progress in your life. On this episode of Liquor Talk, Vic welcomes Lillian Hernandez, the creator of the 'Is This Love or Ego' podcast. Topics covered were ego versus love, the transformative experience of ayahuasca, the importance of shadow work in personal grow, the current trends in baseball, the significance of humility, and how ego can hinder personal connections. The dialogue emphasizes the need for individuals to start their journeys towards growth without waiting for the perfect moment, highlighting actionable steps for 2025. Please follow and support both creatives.
[00:00:00] Liquor Talk, a brand new episode starts now, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome on, welcome everybody to another edition of the Liquor Talk Podcast on the MBG Podcast Network. Check out the MBG Podcast Network. A lot of great shows on there. Go ahead and subscribe if you haven't done so already. And also shout out to everybody who's checking out the podcast on our podcast, Spotify, and iHeartRadio. And ladies and gentlemen, we got another great episode for you. We got a guest today.
[00:00:29] She, she hosts not one, but two podcasts today, but today we're going to be dealing with her podcast, Is This Love or Ego Podcast. Let's welcome Lily to the podcast today. Lily, how you doing today?
[00:00:42] Good. Thank you for having me.
[00:00:43] No problem. No problem. Now tell the people where you podcast from.
[00:00:47] I'm in New Jersey, where the drones are hovering.
[00:00:52] Wow. Where the drones are hovering?
[00:00:55] Yes, sir.
[00:00:56] Man, shout out to New Jersey. You're the second person from New Jersey I'd have had on the podcast this season. So shout out to New Jersey, shout out to New York. I might be coming to New York for a season premiere in 2025. That's still in the works.
[00:01:12] Okay.
[00:01:12] Okay.
[00:01:12] But why don't you go ahead and tell the people about the podcast you've been working on, Is This Love or Ego Podcast?
[00:01:18] Yes.
[00:01:19] Well, Is This Love or Ego is something that I thought about after I went under the medicine ayahuasca.
[00:01:28] And it had me wondering, in what light do I come to other people? Am I coming from ego or am I coming from a place of love when I interact with others, when people come to me, friends or family, and I give my input or what's my aura, what's the energy that I'm coming with.
[00:01:47] And just in general, how I present myself, what I think of myself. And so after experiencing that death of ego with ayahuasca, I thought, why not? Like, where am I really coming from? And I thought about sharing that experience and the things that I've learned since then, and some lessons that I've learned with people who are probably experiencing the same thing.
[00:02:10] Mm-hmm. So what's the biggest lesson you've learned in the whole experience?
[00:02:19] Ego is the head. Ego is conditioning. It's what we were taught. And, you know, we're overthinking everything. And we think that by putting a facade, we're helping a situation. But what we're thinking is the opposite. We're controlling a situation. We're not actually letting things flow.
[00:02:39] And love is just letting people be, letting them be who they really are. So that's really been, like, my biggest lesson. That I'm still learning to really, like, apply in my real life. Like, just let people be. Let them show you who they really are.
[00:02:52] You know what? That is really a major lesson. Because sometimes if you sit back and just let people be, they will show you who they really are. And also, one thing I've learned is adversity will let you show who people are.
[00:03:05] Because sometimes you only got to sit back and force them. Just let some bad shit happen to you. And you'll see who show up for you.
[00:03:12] A hundred percent. A hundred percent.
[00:03:14] A hundred percent.
[00:03:15] Now, also, now, you told me you had another podcast as well. Talk a little bit about that podcast as well. I know you're not really doing that podcast. But talk a little bit about that podcast as well.
[00:03:25] I'll tell you that I can't remember how many episodes I have on it. I know it's about 12 to 14 episodes a season. And I was probably on, like, season six or seven. That was on True Lessons. That's more geared towards having guests come on.
[00:03:40] I've had psychotherapists on to discuss anxiety and certain trauma responses. More so what they've experienced on either the victim side or helping their clients and patients in dealing with these things that happen in life.
[00:03:58] And True Lessons was my baby. That one I started during the pandemic. So that really got me through.
[00:04:06] And trying to help other people, I really learned a lot about myself.
[00:04:11] That's amazing. It feels like everybody all started their podcast during the pandemic.
[00:04:18] I get it. I was two years in already, but I will admit, Liquor Talk really boomed during the pandemic because I was able to get more guests on.
[00:04:27] So I thought everybody definitely was on that podcast vibe. And unfortunately, I'm glad to see you kept it going.
[00:04:36] Unfortunately, some people, they've just given up the podcast boom. I don't know why.
[00:04:41] I mean, there's been more of the vlogging thing, right? Like a lot of people are in a room talking.
[00:04:47] And a lot of people have a lot to say, but not a lot of it is with substance, right? It's a lot of bullshit instead of quality content.
[00:04:57] And people are also listening to people who are in these crazy media rooms that they rent and hauls.
[00:05:05] And if they're not in these big places with hair and makeup done and all this, you know, I guess facade, they feel like it's not worthy of a listen.
[00:05:15] But there's so much we can learn from each other as normal people.
[00:05:18] But if we're not, I guess, showing up at a certain way, it doesn't really pick up so much traction.
[00:05:24] So that can be discouraging to some people.
[00:05:26] If that's what you're looking for, you're looking to make money from it or whatever, then that's different, you know?
[00:05:31] Yeah, that's true. And going back to what you said about learning a lot from people, I definitely agree with you because I've definitely learned a lot.
[00:05:39] Just by sitting here and from conversations, you definitely learn a lot.
[00:05:45] So if people would just expand their mind and just let things flow freely and everything that should come will come, you know?
[00:05:53] But I wouldn't say, but I would say just keep pushing with it because I was reading something that said everything that started big, it happened later in life.
[00:06:04] And also, you need to be patient with things, ladies and gentlemen.
[00:06:08] Yes. That instant gratification has us fucked up. I mean, it really does have us fucked up.
[00:06:13] It really does.
[00:06:14] We post something and I've been there. I used to be there, particularly before I did the whole ayahuasca journey and all of that.
[00:06:21] I used to be like, dang, nobody liked that. Especially back in the day when Instagram was, you have 11 likes.
[00:06:27] Like it went from having like a couple people on there to, ooh, now you have more than 11 likes.
[00:06:33] You kind of got sucked into the amount of things instead of the quality of who you're reaching out to.
[00:06:39] So definitely consistency is key. Not giving up, that's definitely key to anything that we really do in life.
[00:06:46] Yeah, yeah, that's real. Talk about this ayahuasca journey that you went on and do you recommend people to do it?
[00:06:54] It's a psychedelic. And I believe that everyone should go find what is meant for them to find the answers that they're searching for.
[00:07:02] Or if that's going to be the way to do it, go for it. If not, there's other ways. I'm sure there's meditation retreats you could attend if you're not into the psychedelics.
[00:07:11] I don't think it's for everyone because not everyone is ready to really face some hard shit.
[00:07:17] It took a lot of work to get there. It takes a lot of calling to get there.
[00:07:21] And once you get there, there's still work to happen after. It's not just to get there, have the party and leave.
[00:07:26] There's a lot of real, raw stuff that happens that you have to maneuver and then come back to real life, to 3D, and deal with people's bullshit still and have to deal with that.
[00:07:41] I mean, after that, one of the things that happened for me was I was able to see through my own shit and kill that ego.
[00:07:48] And so because of that, I'm able to see through people.
[00:07:52] So I know if someone's lying to me, I can feel the energy, but I'm like, they're not really lying to me.
[00:07:57] They're lying to themselves. So I kind of just sit back and watch the energy and just let it be because it's not personal to me.
[00:08:02] It's something that they felt the need to cover up or not really be true about.
[00:08:08] So it's like, all right, that's on them, not on me.
[00:08:10] So I've learned not to say things personal, but that's been part of my journey.
[00:08:14] While other people will probably freak out and be like, you lied to me.
[00:08:16] You know, like I can say no, yeah, you know, and it's still like, there's a lot that they can't handle.
[00:08:22] But it really takes you on a journey when you take ayahuasca or any psychedelic.
[00:08:28] You really see a lot of true things that probably your brain protected you from not remembering.
[00:08:34] And that memory lane might not be great.
[00:08:36] And you'll need a lot of assistance, support to face that.
[00:08:41] But anybody who gets the calling, go for it.
[00:08:44] If you don't have the calling, there's other ways to get to what you need to get to.
[00:08:48] But I'm glad I went and I've done it.
[00:08:51] And the people that I know that have gone, have been through and are still going through their journeys to get to where they really should be.
[00:09:00] It's a journey. It's a process. There's no ending to it. It's life.
[00:09:03] We're living it every day.
[00:09:05] Definitely understand that.
[00:09:06] And honestly, I feel like you could get those things.
[00:09:10] Sometimes life will just show you those things.
[00:09:11] You don't need this.
[00:09:13] Sometimes you might need this psychedelic, but you might not need it for some people.
[00:09:16] Because sometimes life will just show you those things.
[00:09:18] And if you just don't see them, then I don't know what's wrong with you.
[00:09:22] Because sometimes life will show us things.
[00:09:25] And then people are just so blind.
[00:09:27] And also, if you don't get one time, life will keep bringing people around to show you what you need to see.
[00:09:34] Oh, yeah. 100%.
[00:09:36] Kudos to you on doing that journey and taking the first steps.
[00:09:40] Because nobody don't really want to take the first steps.
[00:09:43] So it's crazy.
[00:09:45] People tell me, I want to start a podcast.
[00:09:47] I want to do this.
[00:09:49] I want to do that.
[00:09:49] But I don't see the first steps.
[00:09:51] What are you doing to show me that, hey, you want to do this?
[00:09:55] Right.
[00:09:56] Yeah, no.
[00:09:57] Honestly, I think it's...
[00:09:58] Listen to your intuition.
[00:09:59] It'll tell you.
[00:10:00] And I think that you're absolutely right.
[00:10:02] You don't have to go through the psychedelic route.
[00:10:04] I didn't have to either.
[00:10:06] But it kind of did jumpstart a lot of things that otherwise would have taken me a little longer to get to.
[00:10:12] So it was like a boost.
[00:10:14] But I mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally prepared for it.
[00:10:19] So it wasn't just let me go for this retreat and then come back and be like, all right, let me tell you my story.
[00:10:25] It wasn't like that because everything is about intention.
[00:10:28] So, you know, if you're going with good intentions, you'll come out with good intentions.
[00:10:32] That's real.
[00:10:33] That's definitely real.
[00:10:34] On your latest episode of In This Love and Ego, you talked about shadow work.
[00:10:40] And, you know, I definitely feel like shadow work is definitely necessary.
[00:10:44] But nobody don't want to do it.
[00:10:46] So why do you think nobody wants to do the shadow work?
[00:10:49] Because sometimes when you look at yourself and do the work within yourself, you'll really find out some things.
[00:10:58] And also, if you can't hold yourself accountable for things, why the hell are you trying to hold other people accountable for things?
[00:11:06] That's us being hypocrites and coming from a place of ego and not love, right?
[00:11:11] But the shadow work is hard work.
[00:11:13] Shadow work is really getting to know yourself fully.
[00:11:17] And the thing is, shadows, just because they're in the dark doesn't mean it's bad.
[00:11:23] It's just that you don't know it.
[00:11:25] And when we don't know something, we fear it.
[00:11:28] There's some sort of understanding that we should fear something.
[00:11:31] And if you don't really get to know yourself, it's going to be explored in other ways.
[00:11:36] Anytime you have a drink, that little shadow of yours that you don't want to explore is going to come out.
[00:11:41] Anytime you get high, it's going to come out.
[00:11:42] Anytime you get angry or anxious, it's going to come out.
[00:11:45] And you're not going to know how to handle it because you haven't want to meet that side of you.
[00:11:49] You kind of suppress it.
[00:11:51] There's nothing wrong with you.
[00:11:52] Just get to know that part of you so that you can understand yourself.
[00:11:57] But a lot of times, we don't really communicate with ourselves in that transparent light.
[00:12:03] And then we expect other people to figure us out or to hold space for us.
[00:12:06] But we're not doing it.
[00:12:08] Shadow work is necessary because knowing yourself fully, well, then you can understand yourself fully, love yourself fully.
[00:12:15] And then you can also hold space for somebody else to be themselves authentically too.
[00:12:19] Until you haven't done that, you don't know yourself.
[00:12:22] People are not going to know you.
[00:12:23] And you're not really going to know other people either.
[00:12:25] For real, for real.
[00:12:27] You got to definitely have an understanding as well for yourself.
[00:12:30] And also, when you do a better work of understanding yourself, you won't take no shit from people.
[00:12:36] Trust me.
[00:12:37] I've learned that.
[00:12:37] I've had to learn that the hard way.
[00:12:39] Like once I started doing that shadow work and once I learned not to take bullshit from others,
[00:12:44] you start taking bullshit from others because people are going to keep trying you because they see something in you that you don't see.
[00:12:51] So they're going to keep trying you on some dumb shit.
[00:12:55] And then y'all going to be around here wondering what happened, why they keep stuck in this dumb shit over and over again.
[00:13:02] So I would say people do the shadow work.
[00:13:04] It's definitely hard, but people need to go take time and just do it.
[00:13:09] Yeah.
[00:13:10] Yeah.
[00:13:10] Honestly, there's so many tools out there.
[00:13:12] There's free tools out there.
[00:13:14] There's courses.
[00:13:15] There's I mean, I have a course that's I can't wait for clients to really get in there and try to self-paced at their own time.
[00:13:24] Um, there's journals out there.
[00:13:26] Go on Amazon, look up a shadow work journal, like do the work because this is why it's easier, not easy, but easier for some people to place boundaries and live the life that they truly deserve versus people who haven't done the work.
[00:13:42] They're like, I told them, I said that.
[00:13:43] But if you're not really holding yourself accountable, you can't hold other people accountable.
[00:13:48] Boundaries go out the door and you're going to constantly find yourself in toxic patterns or unhealthy dynamics and relationships, whether it be with a coworker, a neighbor, a love interest and so forth.
[00:14:01] Yes, that's real.
[00:14:02] You definitely got to do that work.
[00:14:04] And also because it's going to come back and it's going to show you whether you've been awesome.
[00:14:09] But also, ladies and gentlemen, I will say this, though.
[00:14:12] Don't be too hard on yourself.
[00:14:13] Give yourself some grace, you know, because I remember I had a college professor.
[00:14:17] He told me, hey, you're being too hard on yourself.
[00:14:20] You're right where you should be.
[00:14:22] It's just, you got to understand things take time with life.
[00:14:25] So you can't be too hard on yourself because hold yourself accountable, but don't beat yourself over the side of the head.
[00:14:32] I mean, life beats us up enough.
[00:14:34] You got to come back and love yourself.
[00:14:36] Yes.
[00:14:38] Yes.
[00:14:38] I 100% agree.
[00:14:39] That's grace.
[00:14:40] And that's what shadow work does because a lot of times we are beating ourselves up.
[00:14:43] Because we're trying to fit this molding, this conditioning of who you're supposed to be.
[00:14:48] And then when you don't, then you're like, where's my, where am I worthy?
[00:14:54] You know, where's my value?
[00:14:55] You attach your value to certain things you shouldn't instead of just being.
[00:14:58] I mean, I think about when we're born, right?
[00:15:01] Everybody wants to see the baby.
[00:15:03] They love you.
[00:15:04] They can't wait to hold you.
[00:15:05] They want to be around you.
[00:15:06] They don't know anything about you.
[00:15:08] They don't know you.
[00:15:09] You don't know yourself.
[00:15:10] You're a baby.
[00:15:10] You're literally just you, your being.
[00:15:12] And then somehow along the line in life, we completely just lose track of that love.
[00:15:19] You start to get older and people start pulling away.
[00:15:22] They're not as excited to see you.
[00:15:24] Nothing you do is cute anymore.
[00:15:26] Like you're annoying.
[00:15:27] What's happening?
[00:15:28] So we start to lose the idea of just being.
[00:15:32] And then we have to go through this whole journey to finally get back to just being.
[00:15:37] Just be.
[00:15:37] Be human.
[00:15:38] Be you.
[00:15:39] Make a mistake.
[00:15:40] Laugh like you used to when you were little, when you were younger and move on.
[00:15:44] We're getting stuck on these like negative nuances instead of just enjoying life and moving forward.
[00:15:52] Yes.
[00:15:52] We should do all of those things and just move forward because life is too damn short out here
[00:15:58] because people die every day and it's no matter how old you are.
[00:16:03] Life is too damn short for all this stuff.
[00:16:06] Ladies and gentlemen, this is Liquor Talk.
[00:16:08] The more you drink, the better we sound.
[00:16:10] Tune in on all platforms.
[00:16:12] So there's Apple Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartRadio.
[00:16:16] Let us know what you think about shadow work as well.
[00:16:20] Let us know what you think about taking those journey to bettering yourself.
[00:16:25] Now, what do you say about people who they'll do the work, but then they'll find themselves regressing?
[00:16:32] Like, what's the best way to stop regressing?
[00:16:35] Do you address it head on or what's the best way to just stop regressing?
[00:16:40] That's also part of the journey.
[00:16:42] Because, I mean, life is not linear.
[00:16:45] You might take two steps back to take 10 forward.
[00:16:48] You know, it's a reminder from the universe.
[00:16:51] Like, hey, here's a lesson.
[00:16:54] Have you learned it?
[00:16:56] You don't necessarily have to find yourself in the same pattern, but you could find yourself in a similar situation to see how you'll handle it.
[00:17:03] Because you might be in a very healthy relationship now and you weren't in the past.
[00:17:09] How are you going to value this healthy relationship?
[00:17:12] Or are you going to self-sabotage now?
[00:17:14] So it's not necessarily, to me, I don't think it's a regression.
[00:17:19] Sometimes we may feel like it is because maybe we're comparing ourselves to even our old selves, which we shouldn't do.
[00:17:25] Because that person no longer exists.
[00:17:27] You know, we're on this journey of moving forward and becoming anew whenever, you know, we learn a new lesson and we've come into a new version of ourselves.
[00:17:36] And so we think that it's regression, but it's really just a testament to life not being linear and just going with the flow.
[00:17:44] If you need to take a step back, pause, reflect, observe, and ask yourself what you need to go back and maybe go to another retreat.
[00:17:52] Maybe go see your therapist for another six months and kind of hash out some things that you thought you worked on and have grace.
[00:17:59] That's what it's all about because, again, life is not linear.
[00:18:03] You're going to have moments where you think you're going in circles and it's just pushing you to a new transition, a new level in life.
[00:18:11] And sometimes it's going to feel like you're going back, but you're just experiencing another layer, another level of growth.
[00:18:19] Yes, yes, definitely.
[00:18:21] Definitely experiencing that growth.
[00:18:23] Let's switch things up a little bit.
[00:18:25] Can you believe next week is Christmas?
[00:18:28] I don't.
[00:18:29] It's been a crazy year.
[00:18:30] It's been so fast.
[00:18:31] I've never experienced a year so fast like this one.
[00:18:35] Yes, it feels like this year is just like speeding on.
[00:18:39] It feels like we're in Germany and life is just speeding on a goddamn Autobahn.
[00:18:44] I'm like, did we just have Thanksgiving?
[00:18:47] I'm like, God damn.
[00:18:49] Yeah, no, it feels like that.
[00:18:51] Yeah.
[00:18:51] It's like we just had Thanksgiving.
[00:18:54] I just celebrated a birthday.
[00:18:56] And now I'm looking up next week is Christmas.
[00:19:00] Yeah, I'm I just don't see holidays the same anymore anyway.
[00:19:04] So to me, it's like already really, you know, like I decorate.
[00:19:08] I do the whole like I like to bring that energy into my home.
[00:19:13] But my kids are older now.
[00:19:15] So I also see life differently when they're older because it's the magic of Christmas is
[00:19:19] not like it used to be.
[00:19:20] So and then going through the whole spiritual journey and growth, you don't see life the
[00:19:25] same.
[00:19:26] You know, you don't see holidays the same.
[00:19:27] But I feel like a lot more people are in the spirit.
[00:19:31] Like when I drive around the neighborhood, there's a lot of people with their lights on
[00:19:34] and it wasn't like that previously.
[00:19:35] So I like to see it.
[00:19:37] I like to see that energy.
[00:19:38] Yeah, I definitely agree with you.
[00:19:41] Because I guess while I go older, it's just, hey, it's Christmas.
[00:19:44] And also, I guess I'm saying that because I personally don't have any kids as well.
[00:19:48] So it's like but I still see the Christmas trees.
[00:19:50] I do see the lights.
[00:19:53] Even I see the TikToks of people going above and beyond with their lights.
[00:19:58] I'm like, I don't know how the hell you can afford all them goddamn lights, the damn light
[00:20:05] shows and stuff.
[00:20:07] Y'all got to be multimillionaires out here.
[00:20:09] The way these light bills are.
[00:20:11] Y'all are crazy.
[00:20:12] But I know it's just like, I don't know.
[00:20:15] It's a it's a nice time of the year to do it.
[00:20:18] I just wish people would carry that energy throughout the year of being so given and
[00:20:22] so upbeat.
[00:20:23] And I bring the light on all year round.
[00:20:26] Like, you know, it sucks that we wait as a collective to to bring that energy as a community
[00:20:32] and really find a way to see our family and friends and enjoy life.
[00:20:36] Like we're not enjoying enough of it.
[00:20:38] Like it sucks that we wait to the point.
[00:20:41] Yeah, it does suck that.
[00:20:43] And then if you think about all the holidays, like, you know what time people really show
[00:20:47] up for those things or do those things is during that damn holiday instead of trying
[00:20:52] to make it a year round thing.
[00:20:54] I'm like, if you feel the mood to give somebody something, give them something.
[00:20:58] You don't have to wait for Christmas to do it.
[00:21:00] Or if you feel like if you're in love, you don't have to wait for Valentine's Day to show
[00:21:05] love for somebody.
[00:21:06] Or if you want some damn turkey, you don't have to wait for Thanksgiving.
[00:21:10] Like, come on now.
[00:21:12] It's true.
[00:21:12] It's true.
[00:21:13] And that's the thing.
[00:21:14] I think that when you outgrow certain things like conditionings and you know you're no longer
[00:21:20] going by a calendar, like, okay.
[00:21:23] Like, I've never really...
[00:21:24] I love New Year's Eve because everybody's all dressed up and all that.
[00:21:27] But I always felt like my new year is my birthday.
[00:21:30] Like, that's my new year.
[00:21:31] Like, I'm coming into a new stage in life so that I always feel like that's the new year
[00:21:36] for me.
[00:21:37] Or the springtime.
[00:21:38] Like, I've never been with a calendar.
[00:21:40] Like, it's always been, like, at a different time.
[00:21:43] But I agree.
[00:21:44] Like, why wait?
[00:21:45] Like, then something happens.
[00:21:47] Or, you know, you're waiting for that moment.
[00:21:49] And maybe, you know, life happens and you're unable to meet.
[00:21:52] And then, like, the pandemic.
[00:21:54] All of a sudden, everybody wants to see each other.
[00:21:56] Where was that energy before they shut everything down?
[00:21:59] I didn't see that energy prior to that.
[00:22:02] Now everybody wants a hug.
[00:22:03] Like, you weren't touching before.
[00:22:05] Now you want physical contact.
[00:22:07] Yeah, because people were taking it for granted.
[00:22:10] Like, people were taking it for granted because COVID had everybody paranoid.
[00:22:14] Oh, social distancing.
[00:22:16] Can't be around others.
[00:22:18] And people were just going paranoid.
[00:22:21] I'm like, as long as you wash your ass and you're clean, I mean, you shouldn't be going
[00:22:27] through that shit, you know?
[00:22:29] I know.
[00:22:30] It's hilarious.
[00:22:30] Although, like, I ain't mind it in public.
[00:22:32] And if you're on the line or something and it's like six feet, I don't want nobody behind
[00:22:36] me breathing if I'm in a Costco line forever.
[00:22:39] Like, you can back up.
[00:22:40] Like, we're no longer in a pandemic.
[00:22:41] But, you know, some space is good.
[00:22:43] Like, don't be alone on me.
[00:22:45] But it's funny because once you're told you can't have something, you want it.
[00:22:49] So it's like people do take things for granted.
[00:22:51] If they think they can have it at any time, they don't really pay attention to it.
[00:22:55] Yeah, that's definitely true.
[00:22:58] But with the spirit of Christmas, what is the best gift that one of your lovers has ever
[00:23:04] bought you?
[00:23:04] I wonder if you could type an answer I got like two or three seasons ago.
[00:23:11] I've never gotten a gift that's amazing or...
[00:23:16] Really?
[00:23:16] So none of your husbands, your kids ain't never bought you nothing on Christmas that was like
[00:23:23] amazing?
[00:23:24] No.
[00:23:25] No, no.
[00:23:26] Wow.
[00:23:26] I don't...
[00:23:27] No, I don't...
[00:23:31] I don't know.
[00:23:32] It's funny.
[00:23:32] Well, I'll tell you this.
[00:23:34] To be like transparent, I've never asked for anything.
[00:23:39] Oh, wow.
[00:23:39] Like, I've never been the type to be like, here's my list or I want this.
[00:23:42] And I've never been like that materialistic girl.
[00:23:45] I will say I do love to eat right.
[00:23:49] Like, I love to like cook good at home.
[00:23:52] So it's like, I make sure like, I'm, you know, I'm a homemaker.
[00:23:56] So I love to cook or whatever.
[00:23:57] But my money goes towards like vacations.
[00:24:00] I love to experience going somewhere.
[00:24:03] Like if I want to hop on a plane, I'm in Jersey.
[00:24:06] I was born and raised here, but I'm a LA Dodgers fan.
[00:24:09] Love baseball.
[00:24:10] And if I could hop on a plane and go watch them play at their home stadium, that's like, that's a gift for me.
[00:24:16] Like, that's...
[00:24:16] Wow.
[00:24:18] That's the kind of girl I am.
[00:24:19] Like, don't give me no freaking expensive ass purse.
[00:24:22] I don't want that.
[00:24:22] I want to get on a plane and like live life through experiences, not getting so...
[00:24:29] To credit, you know, my people.
[00:24:31] I feel you.
[00:24:33] I feel you.
[00:24:34] Shout out to a New Yorker, somebody in New York.
[00:24:38] They told me that two...
[00:24:40] I think it was two or three seasons, three or four seasons ago.
[00:24:43] They said the all time best answer, which was they got a divorce from their husband right around Christmas.
[00:24:49] And I was like...
[00:24:50] And they said that was the best gift that their husband could give them.
[00:24:54] Oh, that's hilarious.
[00:24:56] Wow.
[00:24:56] So, if y'all want to hear that episode, it's somewhere in the 220s or 230s.
[00:25:02] Christmas 2022 was that episode, ladies and gentlemen.
[00:25:06] Okay.
[00:25:07] But get back to you, though.
[00:25:11] How...
[00:25:12] I want to know this.
[00:25:13] How are you a Dodgers fan and you live in New Jersey?
[00:25:17] So, my family...
[00:25:21] My dad's side, they're not really baseball fans.
[00:25:24] But my mom's side of the family, they are.
[00:25:27] And I grew up going to Shea Stadium.
[00:25:30] They were huge Mets fans.
[00:25:32] And then Citi Field after.
[00:25:34] But I'm a huge baseball fan.
[00:25:36] Like, I remember being a little girl watching the Mets on TV because we didn't have cable.
[00:25:41] So, I would watch them on Channel 11 at night when I was like in middle school.
[00:25:46] But as I became an adult, I was like, you know, the Mets ain't never going to win.
[00:25:52] And like...
[00:25:55] Damn.
[00:25:56] I just...
[00:25:57] You know.
[00:25:59] And I just can't see myself rocking with the Yankees.
[00:26:02] Like, it's just so serious over there.
[00:26:05] It's like militant.
[00:26:06] Like, I just...
[00:26:06] And I've been to their stadiums several times.
[00:26:09] I really love the Pepsi Lounge, by the way.
[00:26:11] Like, I really like the vibe there.
[00:26:13] But I was just like, no.
[00:26:15] It's just that...
[00:26:16] Like, I was always looking for a team that as an adult, I chose for myself.
[00:26:19] Not because my mommy and my uncle and my family, they're all Mets fans.
[00:26:22] Like, no.
[00:26:23] So, I actually took a trip to LA with my best friend.
[00:26:27] And I was like, you know what?
[00:26:29] I'm on a baseball park chasing journey.
[00:26:32] So, I was like, let's see the Dodgers.
[00:26:34] And I, like, fell in love immediately.
[00:26:36] Wow.
[00:26:38] Their stadium, the vibe, the culture, the team.
[00:26:40] I was just like, yes!
[00:26:41] This is it!
[00:26:42] And it was sailing from there.
[00:26:46] Okay.
[00:26:46] Respect.
[00:26:47] Respect.
[00:26:47] I don't know how y'all dealt with that LA traffic because I remember going to LA.
[00:26:52] Like, I felt like we were in traffic every day.
[00:26:54] And I've seen some of them crowds at Dodger Stadium.
[00:26:57] And I'm like, I don't know.
[00:26:59] I bet y'all were in traffic for hours leaving that stadium.
[00:27:04] Um, I'll tell you that I had such a good time that it just didn't matter.
[00:27:07] And then I went with my husband to San Diego because he was a Padres fan.
[00:27:11] He was.
[00:27:12] See how I said he was.
[00:27:15] And they were having a series with the Dodgers.
[00:27:18] And we stayed right there in San Diego.
[00:27:19] I was like, I am not trying to be in this traffic.
[00:27:22] And we saw two games back to back.
[00:27:24] And the Dodgers beat them back to back.
[00:27:28] But it's just so exciting for me.
[00:27:31] The energy of baseball.
[00:27:32] I mean, it's just, it just, I don't know.
[00:27:34] So family friendly for me.
[00:27:36] And just, I know the sport so well.
[00:27:39] And I enjoy it from the first pitch to the last out.
[00:27:43] It's just something I love to do.
[00:27:44] Yeah.
[00:27:45] Oh, yeah.
[00:27:45] That's amazing.
[00:27:46] And congratulations to you, Dodgers.
[00:27:48] I saw they did win the World Series.
[00:27:50] Yes.
[00:27:51] Thank you.
[00:27:51] I know you were loving it because they beat the Yankees.
[00:27:54] I know you were loving it.
[00:27:55] You were just loving it.
[00:27:57] Listen, I was loving it when they removed, when they eliminated the Padres.
[00:28:01] Then they eliminated the Mets.
[00:28:02] I was like, that's it.
[00:28:03] They're done.
[00:28:03] They're beating the Yankees.
[00:28:05] They're beating the Yankees.
[00:28:05] And I went to a game in June that they went to the Yankees stadium.
[00:28:10] And the Dodgers crushed them back to back.
[00:28:13] I was like, say bye-bye.
[00:28:16] The Yankees are, they're not going to win this.
[00:28:17] They're not going to win this.
[00:28:19] Yeah.
[00:28:21] Freddie Freeman made the statement.
[00:28:22] And I just, I listen, I go to the gym every day at five in the morning.
[00:28:25] I wake up and go.
[00:28:26] And I could not get up because I was watching these games till midnight.
[00:28:31] So, even my gym schedule was messed up because I was like, I'm watching these games.
[00:28:35] And I was happy I did because the way these guys were playing was insane.
[00:28:39] Couldn't miss a beat.
[00:28:40] It was insane.
[00:28:41] It wasn't over until it was over each game.
[00:28:43] So, it was amazing.
[00:28:44] Yeah, it was some good games.
[00:28:46] I'm not going to lie to you.
[00:28:47] Sometimes after a football game went off, I would see, oh, damn, with the extra innings,
[00:28:52] I'm like, let's see who wins it.
[00:28:54] Then the Dodgers find a way to pull it out.
[00:28:57] And then when they went to Yankee Stadium, I'm like, god damn.
[00:29:01] This ain't the old, I can tell that this ain't the old Yankee Stadium because old Yankee
[00:29:06] Stadium people are intimidated to go in there.
[00:29:08] Yes.
[00:29:09] Yeah, 100%.
[00:29:10] You're right.
[00:29:10] But, you know, like, I don't know.
[00:29:12] There was just something about this year particularly.
[00:29:13] I felt it in my bones.
[00:29:15] And then Ice Cube goes on the field and goes crazy at LA.
[00:29:20] And Fat Joe does some crazy shit over here.
[00:29:22] I was like, no, Fat Joe, it wasn't your time.
[00:29:25] Yeah.
[00:29:26] I'm sorry, Fat Joe.
[00:29:27] You can't type Ice Cube, girl.
[00:29:29] No, no, no, no, no.
[00:29:30] They should have just left it alone.
[00:29:33] I think Yankees should have paid Jay-Z or if they were going to really come for it.
[00:29:38] Honestly, I thought about that.
[00:29:41] I was like, or even El Alpha, who did this whole song for Soto, the Soto Shuffle, whatever.
[00:29:46] Like, that would have been fun because there's so many Dominicans in the Bronx or whatever.
[00:29:50] Like, that would have been different.
[00:29:51] But I'm like, really?
[00:29:52] I was like, this doesn't.
[00:29:54] It's like crickets.
[00:29:55] Like crickets.
[00:29:56] I was like, all right, they're not bringing it today.
[00:29:58] And I would have liked a little bit more competition, you know, because.
[00:30:01] But sometimes when it's not your day, it's not your turn.
[00:30:04] It's not a good day.
[00:30:05] It is what it is.
[00:30:06] And I'm like, Yankees, y'all be all right.
[00:30:08] Y'all got 27 championships.
[00:30:09] Y'all be all right.
[00:30:11] It's all right.
[00:30:11] Right, right.
[00:30:12] Like, it's okay.
[00:30:14] That was before I was even like, no.
[00:30:18] Yeah.
[00:30:19] I mean, they had their little run in the 90s, at the end of the 90s.
[00:30:23] But hey, it is what it is.
[00:30:25] That was a captain, though.
[00:30:27] That was different.
[00:30:28] That was a different time in baseball.
[00:30:30] Like, the energy was, it was so different.
[00:30:33] And that's what I bring.
[00:30:34] Like, that's what I remember.
[00:30:36] That's where I fell in love with baseball.
[00:30:38] And so when I watch it, this is like, there's times where I'm like,
[00:30:41] that's what I love about baseball.
[00:30:43] Like, it's not over till it's over.
[00:30:45] Like, when Freeman hit that freaking Grand Slam, it was ridiculous.
[00:30:48] You know, and the World Series lasts out, and then a Grand Slam walk-off.
[00:30:52] What?
[00:30:53] I ain't gonna lie.
[00:30:54] That was crazy.
[00:30:55] I can't even lie to you.
[00:30:58] Unfortunately, it's like, and then I will say this about baseball.
[00:31:01] But it's like, some of these owners, they be ruining baseball, though, because I'm like,
[00:31:05] y'all so damn cheap.
[00:31:06] And then you got the Mets owner over here paying people $700 million.
[00:31:10] I'm like, god damn!
[00:31:12] That's what I did.
[00:31:13] Listen, good for him.
[00:31:16] He was able to achieve that.
[00:31:18] But I think it's outrageous.
[00:31:21] I think it's like, what happened?
[00:31:25] You know what I mean?
[00:31:25] Like, I just don't, Shohei got the same amount, but it's like having two players in one.
[00:31:32] Yeah.
[00:31:32] I mean, pitcher and an amazing hitter.
[00:31:36] I just, I don't.
[00:31:38] Yeah.
[00:31:39] And it's like, and I'm like, I don't know.
[00:31:42] I'm like, in my head, I'm like, they may be glad that baseball don't have a salary cap,
[00:31:45] because it's like, they do make it to where some of these small market teams can't compete.
[00:31:49] But some of those, they find a ways to compete, though.
[00:31:52] I know.
[00:31:53] It should be a lot more even, I guess.
[00:31:55] I don't understand it.
[00:31:56] I always try to, like, look through.
[00:31:58] I look at salaries, and I'm like, well, no wonder.
[00:32:01] You know, and even when I go to, like, because I'm on that baseball park journey,
[00:32:06] like chasing all these baseball parks, and I'm like, there's some that are just amazing.
[00:32:10] Like, I went this summer with my son to see the Pittsburgh Pirates.
[00:32:15] Beautiful energy and atmosphere.
[00:32:16] Very similar to Truist Park in Atlanta.
[00:32:19] Beautiful environment.
[00:32:21] That's, like, a top, top park.
[00:32:23] But then you notice their salary caps, and you're like, how sweet?
[00:32:27] Like, what's going on here?
[00:32:29] Right.
[00:32:30] But then, honestly, I go to the Bronx, and I'm like, that's it?
[00:32:33] Like, it's just cemented in, and then that's it.
[00:32:36] Like, there's not so much of that energy there, and they have a huge salary.
[00:32:41] Like, so it's, I don't know.
[00:32:44] It's an interesting.
[00:32:45] It really is.
[00:32:46] I just want my hometown team to figure out what the hell, what they're going to do,
[00:32:51] because I'm, like, so I'm from Tampa.
[00:32:54] So, naturally, I'm a Rays fan.
[00:32:56] Now we got to play in the Yankee Stadium this year.
[00:32:58] And I'm like, I need y'all to go ahead and just build the darn stadium,
[00:33:02] pay the Yankees for two years, and build the damn stadium,
[00:33:05] because nobody don't want to come see that goddamn truck anyway.
[00:33:09] But the stadium y'all building, y'all talking about building, it looked nice,
[00:33:13] so people want to come down here.
[00:33:15] So, and on top of that, y'all asked us, y'all had two opportunities to win the damn World Series,
[00:33:21] and you don't build from it.
[00:33:22] So, it'll be a miracle if my hometown team ever wins the World Series, you know.
[00:33:29] Because I get mad with them, because I'm like, you beat the Red Sox and Yankees,
[00:33:33] how the hell can we not go all the way?
[00:33:37] That says a lot about our teams, right?
[00:33:40] Like, if you can beat those top teams that are competitive, have the high salary caps,
[00:33:44] the best rosters, you're like, oh, forget it.
[00:33:47] If you can beat them, we got this.
[00:33:49] Yeah, and I'm just like, are you serious?
[00:33:53] And then, I'm not going to lie, we gave y'all asses that World Series, goddammit.
[00:33:59] We gave y'all asses that damn World Series, that dumb pitching decision.
[00:34:04] I'm like, let the man pitch the whole damn game, shit.
[00:34:07] But we gave y'all that damn World Series.
[00:34:09] It happens, and it's a pitcher's game.
[00:34:11] It really is at the end of it all, when all these, everybody could hit,
[00:34:14] but it's really a pitcher's game when it comes to these more highly competitive games
[00:34:19] and these championship games.
[00:34:21] It really comes down to the arms, for sure.
[00:34:23] Yeah, but you know what?
[00:34:25] I'm not going to lie.
[00:34:26] If I look at the race schedule and they're somewhere nice, I might just pull up.
[00:34:30] I might just take the flight out there and pull up.
[00:34:33] You never know.
[00:34:34] But ladies and gentlemen, this is Liquor Talk.
[00:34:38] Let's talk about egos and stuff.
[00:34:40] And why aren't people like to be humble?
[00:34:42] Like, because sometimes life will humble you, or you can humble yourself.
[00:34:48] Because what they have learned about life, and people with big egos need to learn,
[00:34:51] it can all change within the blink of an eye.
[00:34:55] Yes, sir.
[00:34:56] Yes, sir.
[00:34:57] I believe that.
[00:34:58] I don't know.
[00:34:59] I think, I don't know.
[00:35:02] I'm not even going to include social media or none of that,
[00:35:04] because before that, I saw people, how they were.
[00:35:07] But I think sometimes we do confuse ego, maybe confidence,
[00:35:13] because there's a lot of rich people who are humble,
[00:35:16] and then there's poor people who are bougie.
[00:35:20] You know?
[00:35:21] Yes, that's so true.
[00:35:22] I know plenty of poor people who are bougie as hell.
[00:35:26] Like, how do you have all this bougie shit,
[00:35:29] but you can't afford to give your kid, but you're asking me for a dollar?
[00:35:34] Right.
[00:35:34] And I think, you know, a lot of times I like to make that distinction and talk about it, right?
[00:35:39] Because people think that because you live well, you eat well, you drive well,
[00:35:43] you do things well, that you're not humble.
[00:35:47] And humble doesn't mean poor.
[00:35:51] Humble doesn't mean, you know, things like that.
[00:35:56] Like, you can't, or poor education, or urban education, or whatever.
[00:36:00] That has nothing to do with it.
[00:36:01] But a lot of people think that because you're doing well, maybe financially,
[00:36:04] that you're not humble.
[00:36:05] But it's about knowing who you are.
[00:36:07] You're no better than no one else.
[00:36:09] That's being humble.
[00:36:10] It's that you're no better than nobody else.
[00:36:11] Your bank account might be, but as a person, it's not.
[00:36:15] That has nothing to do with who you are, your soul, right?
[00:36:17] So if your soul is right, and you're good, you're gonna be able to share what you have
[00:36:23] with people.
[00:36:23] But the ego gets in the way sometimes of asking for what you need to, right?
[00:36:30] So it's like, oh, I see you're doing well.
[00:36:32] Okay.
[00:36:32] Ask people who are doing well, instead of for money, how about how to fish, right?
[00:36:38] Like the whole story about teaching people how to fish so they can get their own fish.
[00:36:41] Why do you want my fish?
[00:36:43] Go get your own fish.
[00:36:44] Like this for everybody.
[00:36:46] So how about informing yourself, educating yourself to get to where other people are,
[00:36:50] and instead of labeling them as maybe egotistical, materialistic, or whatever,
[00:36:54] they're informed.
[00:36:55] They're informed.
[00:36:56] They're not better than you.
[00:36:58] They're just informed.
[00:36:58] They're maybe a little ahead in the line in the game of financial gains or status,
[00:37:03] but that has nothing to do with your ability to come up where they are,
[00:37:07] or even surpass them at a certain point.
[00:37:10] So ego, I think it's just a fancy word for like competing and comparing yourself to what's
[00:37:16] out there.
[00:37:16] Instead of just owning your own light, you have so much light within you and sharing that
[00:37:22] with other people, right?
[00:37:23] It's like, hey, I know this.
[00:37:25] Let me help you.
[00:37:25] Let me help you get there because it's very likely that with your talent and your capabilities,
[00:37:31] you'll be able to soar with this.
[00:37:33] I might not be able to.
[00:37:34] I just have the idea, but I don't know how to formulate and execute it the way you probably
[00:37:40] could.
[00:37:42] And for real, and it's like, and I get all that.
[00:37:45] And sometimes people will walk around with these big egos, but they're being too humble
[00:37:50] to hurt, ask for help as well.
[00:37:52] It's like, what's the point in having a big ego?
[00:37:54] Like, because we all break down.
[00:37:56] We're all going to need some help at some point in time, because that's why you got to
[00:38:00] remain humble because you just never know when it's your time to be asking for help.
[00:38:05] And also don't be so egotistical to where you can't remember a point where you weren't
[00:38:11] worth that point, which is why when people ask me, hey, how do I start a podcast?
[00:38:15] I'm willing to go ahead and help them out or give some advice and give some tips.
[00:38:20] But I'm going to sit back and watch and see if you're applying those things.
[00:38:23] And if you're not, then what the hell are you asking me for help for if you're not going
[00:38:27] to apply those things?
[00:38:28] They don't want the help.
[00:38:30] They just want the results.
[00:38:31] And I think a lot of people, too, ego is fear.
[00:38:36] So they're also afraid to ask certain questions the same way a lot of people are afraid to answer
[00:38:40] certain questions because they think they're going to lose what they have.
[00:38:44] What's meant for you is meant for you.
[00:38:45] And the sun shines for everybody.
[00:38:47] So there's no need to try to soak up all the sun and assume you're going to keep this
[00:38:53] forever and that it's going to grow if you don't share it.
[00:38:56] There's no such thing.
[00:38:58] The schools wouldn't exist.
[00:38:59] Why would professors share all their knowledge with people?
[00:39:01] They wouldn't exist.
[00:39:03] There's a reason for that, the system.
[00:39:06] Yes, there's a reason for the system.
[00:39:08] There's a reason why college costs and because it's like, it's a lot of knowledge out here
[00:39:14] to get.
[00:39:15] So it's like, and it is what it is.
[00:39:18] And wouldn't you love to be a part of somebody's journey?
[00:39:21] Like, wouldn't that be fulfilling to you to be like, hey, I helped them here.
[00:39:25] And now they're at this point as well.
[00:39:27] Wouldn't it be fulfilling to get your flowers from somebody to be like, hey, thank you for
[00:39:31] helping me out.
[00:39:32] Because I definitely give everybody their flowers along the journey.
[00:39:35] I try to give everybody their flowers along the journey, you know?
[00:39:39] So wouldn't that be more fulfilling than to just be set up here with a big ego, you know?
[00:39:45] A hundred percent.
[00:39:46] I mean, I, as a life coach, um, I have a difficult time asking for, um, reviews, even though they
[00:39:55] come to me like directly, they'll send me a DM or an email or something or a text and say,
[00:40:00] hey, listen, like I finally had that tough conversation and oh my gosh, it changed everything.
[00:40:07] And, you know, and it's like, that to me right there is just like icing on the cake.
[00:40:12] It reminds me of why I do what I do because I love to help people.
[00:40:16] I love to share, um, what I've learned and picked up on a journey so they don't have to
[00:40:20] struggle as much or they're, especially when someone's seeking help, right?
[00:40:24] Because sometimes we try to help people who don't ask for help and they're not going to
[00:40:29] use the information you give them because they're not asking for help, even though they need it.
[00:40:32] They need your assistance and your knowledge.
[00:40:34] Um, but people who really are like, hey, I I've done this, this, and that it's not working out.
[00:40:40] Help me get to this point or whatever.
[00:40:42] That to me is so rewarding because they've already put in some work.
[00:40:46] So it's like, all right, they've put in some work.
[00:40:48] They're going to take it seriously and really run with it.
[00:40:50] So that's definitely like the best flowers I could receive is seeing them do so well.
[00:40:56] Yeah.
[00:40:57] Yeah.
[00:40:58] I, I, I can definitely feel you on that.
[00:41:00] And also I will say some flowers for me would definitely be to see people flourishing within
[00:41:05] their podcasts as well.
[00:41:07] Um, I could be like, Hey, I can remember a time when they first, first was starting and I brought
[00:41:12] them on and now I look up, they're still flourishing.
[00:41:15] And even though it does get this point sometimes as a content creator, you look up, you see people
[00:41:20] not really, not really doing their shows anymore.
[00:41:22] I'm like, God damn, I really gave you the spotlight for this, but shifting gears.
[00:41:27] Um, how does ego ruin relationships?
[00:41:34] It's about me instead of us relationships is, is us.
[00:41:37] It's two people and ego is me, me, me, me, me.
[00:41:41] Yes.
[00:41:42] That is so true.
[00:41:43] Like I wish more people would realize that.
[00:41:46] And also for the people out there, if it's going to be you, you, you know, you better
[00:41:50] off single.
[00:41:51] Like why waste time in being with somebody?
[00:41:54] If you're just going to be only giving a damn about your needs instead of my needs and also
[00:42:00] what we need together collectively.
[00:42:03] Like what is the point in being with somebody?
[00:42:05] If you're going to do these things.
[00:42:07] Right.
[00:42:08] Right.
[00:42:08] It's about their needs and, and that's it, their needs, what they need, what they want,
[00:42:13] what they desire, their goals or hopes or dreams.
[00:42:16] And if that person's not, cause that's, that's really like the biggest thing when I was like,
[00:42:20] what do you bring to the table?
[00:42:22] I mean, I see all these dating things and I'm like, what table are they talking about?
[00:42:26] Like the, the, can we stop talking about this damn table?
[00:42:33] And there's, first of all, I don't believe in a hundred percent anything.
[00:42:37] There is no, uh, you know, a hundred percent of anything.
[00:42:39] That's just a figment of our imagination where we have to measure something.
[00:42:43] But if we were to use that, what is this bullshit about 50, 50 and meet me halfway?
[00:42:48] No, listen, as humans, we don't bring it a hundred percent every day.
[00:42:52] There's times we bring 20.
[00:42:53] There's times we bring 80.
[00:42:54] There's times we bring 50.
[00:42:55] That's your a hundred percent that day.
[00:42:58] Stop measuring and holding people, you know, to a certain like idea and expectation that you set them up for.
[00:43:07] Then when they fail, it's their fault.
[00:43:09] You put them there.
[00:43:11] They showed you who they are.
[00:43:13] You put them over here.
[00:43:14] They've been over here.
[00:43:15] Then you're mad because now the real, the reality set in and they still over there.
[00:43:19] It's like, yes.
[00:43:21] Yes.
[00:43:22] And also, and then you get mad when, when the people that you look down on, I'm like, you looking down on somebody, but that person probably could give you what you need compared to the person that you, you, um, you really want.
[00:43:35] Because it is what it is.
[00:43:37] We've all been there.
[00:43:38] Like the person you may want is not the one you may necessarily may need because the one you need is going to meet you on days where you're not feeling a hundred, you know?
[00:43:48] And yes.
[00:43:50] And I, and I, and I agree with you.
[00:43:51] I'm about tired of hearing about this goddamn table.
[00:43:54] Like, Oh, what do I do table?
[00:43:55] Oh, I am the table or what I need this.
[00:43:59] I'm, I'm, you know what I've realized about these podcasts.
[00:44:03] It's like none of them really, some, some sound authentic, but there's some of them.
[00:44:07] I'm like, are you living that life though?
[00:44:09] Are you just, are you just saying shit for clout?
[00:44:12] Exactly.
[00:44:12] But that's the reason why a lot of them have lost its touch, right?
[00:44:16] Like I used to say, I have a pocket.
[00:44:18] Oh, really?
[00:44:19] And it's like, now I kind of hold back.
[00:44:21] Cause it's like, you have a podcast like YouTube, because there's so many people out there just talking gibberish about relationships and about their struggles, but there's no real medicine.
[00:44:31] There's no real cure.
[00:44:32] There's no real substance.
[00:44:34] So quality message really going out there to help people.
[00:44:37] And then those that are really don't get through.
[00:44:39] Yeah.
[00:44:40] People, people love the bullshit.
[00:44:41] People love to hear about bullshit and trauma.
[00:44:45] Talk about how to elevate and give them real tools.
[00:44:49] They're like, no, no, no.
[00:44:50] It's not entertaining.
[00:44:51] It's not really given.
[00:44:53] So.
[00:44:53] And I'm like, y'all people tripping because yeah, over here is, yeah, we'd be sipping and having some real conversations, but it's like, I'm just not with that drama.
[00:45:03] I'm just not with that.
[00:45:04] Because sometimes that toxic shit of a while, it's like, yeah, it's fun when you're young, but then at the wall, you're like, you're still doing this shit.
[00:45:12] Y'all still on this shit.
[00:45:13] It was never fun for me.
[00:45:15] I got married when I was 16.
[00:45:17] So I like the streets or the clubbing or the being outside.
[00:45:22] It's never, ever for me, ever for me.
[00:45:25] And now that I'm in my thirties and my kids are, my son's in college.
[00:45:30] My daughter's a senior in high school.
[00:45:32] I'm not, I'm still not like, let me be outside.
[00:45:35] Like I like to experience things.
[00:45:36] Let me go eat.
[00:45:37] I would love to go out to dinner.
[00:45:39] Let me go watch this movie.
[00:45:40] Let me go to the museum.
[00:45:42] Might call me boring.
[00:45:43] I don't care.
[00:45:44] I love to hit the gym, go get something to eat real good.
[00:45:47] Do my thing.
[00:45:48] That's just me.
[00:45:49] But.
[00:45:49] You know, that honestly, that's not really boring because I definitely agree with you.
[00:45:53] Um, I would love to, because like I said, if the club scene for me is stopping when I left college.
[00:46:00] I mean, I love to hit a lounge every now and then with friends.
[00:46:03] I like to go to like people houses when they're having game nights and stuff, but I'm not bad to be out here in the streets and people out here crazy.
[00:46:11] They be shooting out here too.
[00:46:12] And I need to live, you know?
[00:46:14] Yeah.
[00:46:15] No.
[00:46:15] Listen, listen, Florida is another, it's another, um, it's a whole other subject on its own.
[00:46:22] It's a whole other world.
[00:46:23] Yes.
[00:46:24] I, I moved, we moved down there for eight months and I was like, I, I gotta go.
[00:46:29] I gotta go.
[00:46:30] We came back home, but I lived in Oviedo for eight months.
[00:46:34] And I was like, okay, it's, it's, it's a different, it's a culture shock for me.
[00:46:39] It was definitely a culture shock.
[00:46:40] I mean, it was a culture shock because there's a lot of people from New Jersey and New York down here.
[00:46:46] So I'm surprised that I was teaching and where I was teaching and where I was working.
[00:46:53] They were like, miss, you got an accent.
[00:46:55] I was like, what?
[00:46:58] They're like, I think, I think what it is.
[00:47:02] Um, you know, I think what it, no, I think what it was, I think it's the fact that you
[00:47:10] were in the Orlando area, you know?
[00:47:12] So I think had you came to Tampa, you may have been okay.
[00:47:15] Cause that's hella Cubans and hella, uh, people from New York as well.
[00:47:20] Yes.
[00:47:21] I have a really good friend who lives there in Tampa, um, Desenia.
[00:47:26] And when I went to visit her there in that area, I really loved it.
[00:47:31] I was like, Oh shoot.
[00:47:32] And I lived in Oviedo at that time.
[00:47:33] I was like, how come I haven't been to Tampa?
[00:47:35] Like, I really liked the vibe over there.
[00:47:37] It felt more of the New Jersey, New York kind of flow versus where I was.
[00:47:42] But overall, I mean, we got to see different parts of Florida and visit here and there.
[00:47:47] And I was like, yeah, I think I'm just a Jersey girl, man.
[00:47:50] And I needed my weather change.
[00:47:51] Like I actually looked forward to, it's about to get cold.
[00:47:56] We're about to layer up and then it's going to get spring.
[00:47:58] And we're going to, it just, I didn't, I didn't feel like it was even Christmas.
[00:48:02] I was like, what the, what's going on?
[00:48:05] It's not cold.
[00:48:06] Like, I mean, Florida, it will get cold for maybe two seconds.
[00:48:10] And then it's back to, and I'm like, I'm good.
[00:48:13] And for everybody that says all one expense, all four seasons live in North Florida, live
[00:48:18] in Jacksonville, live in Tallahassee.
[00:48:20] Um, you'll definitely experience all four seasons.
[00:48:23] I just don't know you see no goddamn snow on the road and stuff because that's some places
[00:48:28] I'm like, how the hell y'all function with five and six inches of snow?
[00:48:33] I'm like, God damn.
[00:48:34] Oh yeah.
[00:48:35] Yeah.
[00:48:35] And I live in the mountains.
[00:48:36] So a foot of snow can, can definitely like disappear.
[00:48:41] I mean, the other day we had like two inches and I was like, nah, the sun will melt it later.
[00:48:46] Like whatever.
[00:48:47] I was just like, we're not going out there.
[00:48:49] It is what it is, but everything's an adjustment, you know?
[00:48:53] Yes.
[00:48:54] Everything is definitely an indefinite adjustment.
[00:48:57] Uh, ladies and gentlemen, once again, this is liquor talk.
[00:48:59] I hope you guys are enjoying what you are hearing.
[00:49:02] Please tell us what you think.
[00:49:03] Tell us what you're thinking, uh, what you want to know.
[00:49:06] And also if you got any questions, please slide in the DMs.
[00:49:10] Now with this being the end of the year, what are some things people can do for self growth
[00:49:14] in 2025?
[00:49:16] Because we already covered the shadow work.
[00:49:18] What are some other things people can do in 2025 that will help with their growth?
[00:49:24] Just start whatever it is that you've always wanted to do.
[00:49:28] Start.
[00:49:28] Don't wait for 2026.
[00:49:29] Don't wait for June.
[00:49:31] Don't wait for January.
[00:49:32] If you're listening to this before 2025, start today.
[00:49:35] You want to lose weight.
[00:49:36] Start today.
[00:49:37] You want a better start today.
[00:49:38] You want to make that phone call.
[00:49:40] Start today.
[00:49:40] You want to go somebody ghost them today, whatever.
[00:49:43] Stop waiting.
[00:49:44] For life to happen.
[00:49:45] For you to live your life.
[00:49:46] Because that's just not going to happen on its own.
[00:49:49] So you need to take the necessary steps on your own and be consistent with it.
[00:49:53] Be true to your word.
[00:49:54] You want to go no contact?
[00:49:55] Go no contact.
[00:49:56] Respect and, you know, honor your word.
[00:49:58] It's one of the four agreements is be impeccable with your word.
[00:50:02] If you're not going to honor your word, no one's going to give a shit about your word.
[00:50:05] So you have to do that on your own.
[00:50:07] For real.
[00:50:08] Start.
[00:50:09] Yes.
[00:50:09] And for my people in relationships and stuff, give the person some decency.
[00:50:16] Respectfully bow out and tell them why you bowing out.
[00:50:19] Don't leave them around hanging.
[00:50:20] You know what I'm saying?
[00:50:21] Oh, no.
[00:50:22] Don't be an asshole.
[00:50:22] Yeah, don't be an asshole.
[00:50:24] Because listen.
[00:50:25] No.
[00:50:25] Because unfortunately, that was one of my L's this year.
[00:50:28] I got go to it.
[00:50:29] And you know what?
[00:50:30] To the person, I know you might be listening to this.
[00:50:32] Just know I forgive you.
[00:50:33] Because you know what?
[00:50:34] You just weren't ready for me.
[00:50:36] So it is what it is.
[00:50:38] But I definitely agree with you.
[00:50:40] Just get started.
[00:50:41] Because the more you get, once you get started and you get to a rhythm, you're going to keep
[00:50:46] going.
[00:50:47] You're going to keep doing it.
[00:50:48] Because you're going to make it a habit.
[00:50:50] Just do whatever you want to do.
[00:50:52] Just go ahead and start.
[00:50:53] And quit waiting around for the new year.
[00:50:54] Because everybody does that.
[00:50:56] And you know what?
[00:50:58] And you definitely made a good point about the birthday and stuff.
[00:51:00] Because I had a coworker tell me that years ago.
[00:51:03] You know what?
[00:51:04] And I've been rolling with it ever since.
[00:51:06] So hey, once you get started, you'll definitely see the results.
[00:51:11] Oh yeah.
[00:51:11] A hundred percent.
[00:51:12] Just do it.
[00:51:14] And if you need some help doing it, just go ahead and ask for the help.
[00:51:17] Don't be too humped.
[00:51:19] Don't be too set up in your ego to where you can't ask somebody for assistance.
[00:51:24] Or you can't ask somebody for something.
[00:51:26] And also, be willing to help others.
[00:51:28] Be willing to give people the opportunity and stuff.
[00:51:31] Why do you think I have so many guests on Lookertalk?
[00:51:33] Like, hey, I enjoy the conversations as well.
[00:51:36] And 2020, 2025, I'm looking to take these conversations on the road.
[00:51:40] And yes, I will have a bottle with me.
[00:51:42] So y'all tell me what y'all like.
[00:51:44] And we're going to be taking these conversations on the road.
[00:51:47] That sounds so much fun.
[00:51:51] Hey, you never know.
[00:51:52] I might have to run it back with you.
[00:51:55] Up in New Jersey when it's warm.
[00:51:57] Because I'm not about to come up there when it's super cold.
[00:52:01] Why not?
[00:52:03] You'll lose your whole tan.
[00:52:04] I'm so pale right now.
[00:52:05] It's not even funny.
[00:52:10] Yeah, but I know you probably want to wait for the summertime to get here, you know.
[00:52:15] So, hey, get that glow back.
[00:52:18] Yes, yes.
[00:52:20] But what's the plan for your podcast with 2025 coming around?
[00:52:25] You know, I have just been going with the flow.
[00:52:28] I am focusing on releasing my book.
[00:52:31] Before our call, I was just on the call with my editor.
[00:52:34] So I'm excited to release my book.
[00:52:37] I'm going to put all that out there on my IG page.
[00:52:40] I'm going to be focusing heavily on that because one day Facebook's out or one day TikTok is gone.
[00:52:46] So IG's been pretty consistent.
[00:52:47] Instagram.
[00:52:48] So if you're on Instagram, look me up.
[00:52:50] Coach underscore Lillian underscore.
[00:52:52] I don't know what it is about IG and their underscores, but it is what it is.
[00:52:56] But I'll be putting more on the book there.
[00:52:58] And with podcasting, whenever I feel like there's a message coming through and I should share it, that's when I hop on and I just post it and publish the episode.
[00:53:07] So if you're interested, is this Love or Ego podcast?
[00:53:10] And I don't know what will happen with True Lessons, but whatever kind of comes, I'll put it out there.
[00:53:19] So just always be on the lookout.
[00:53:20] Subscribe to it.
[00:53:21] Follow it so you don't miss out if an episode does come out.
[00:53:24] And also, once you drop that book, if you can get me a copy, I'd love to.
[00:53:30] We can do an IG Live segment and we talk about your book.
[00:53:33] We'll do a book breakdown and stuff.
[00:53:35] And I will really do a deep dive on your book.
[00:53:38] And that's a message to all you authors out there.
[00:53:41] 2025, I will be doing deep dives on books.
[00:53:44] So get me a copy and we can step in and I'll chop it up with you and break down, get my thoughts and stuff and tell people that they need to go ahead and buy your book.
[00:53:53] Because, hey, I'm going to have it read as well, you know.
[00:53:56] So I've read some good works as well.
[00:53:57] So I'd definitely like to support it any way I can.
[00:54:01] But, Lily, I want to thank you for your time and thank you for being on the Liquor Talk podcast.
[00:54:07] Any final messages you got for the people?
[00:54:11] Listen, whenever you see yourself in an opportunity to do good and be good, just do that.
[00:54:17] We always have a choice.
[00:54:18] So just tap into the better version of yourself.
[00:54:21] In the long run, it'll pay off.
[00:54:23] That's real.
[00:54:24] That's definitely real.
[00:54:25] Like I said, Lily, if you ever want to collaborate again, if you need my assistance with something, I might be down here in Florida, but I'm always a DM away.
[00:54:33] So whenever you need me, just holla at me.
[00:54:35] We'll make some things happen.
[00:54:37] Thank you for your time.
[00:54:38] And thank you to listeners for listening to Liquor Talk.
[00:54:40] Tell me what you thought of this episode, whether you tapped in on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartRadio.
[00:54:46] Remember to subscribe.
[00:54:47] And remember to tell a friend to subscribe.
[00:54:49] And please follow us on Instagram for live updates.
[00:54:52] IG Lives are coming in 2025.
[00:54:55] Until the next episode, keep pouring it up.
[00:54:58] And ladies and gentlemen, hope you guys have a great holiday.
[00:55:00] And we out this thing.
[00:55:02] Peace.